To the utmost surprise of his friends, family and work acquaintances, it has emerged this morning that James Clothe of Brentford has been ignoring the recommended serving suggestion of oven-pizzas ‘ever since I(he) could remember’.
Instead of reading the cardboard inscription and acting upon it sensibly to indeed ‘prepare a traditional mozzarella salad and a fine Italian beer’, Clothe has repeatedly chosen a different path.
His housemate Clive Fenton, who stumbled upon James’ secret had this to say, ‘ I walked into the living room and James had his regular pizza there but there was no fine italian beer, and definitely no salad. Heck, I would’ve settled for a Fosters and a Dairylea but nothing, ‘cept maybe a Dr. Pepper for some reason. Normally he takes his pizza into his room so I just assumed he had a healthy mix of spinach, goats cheese and Peroni in there. Now I don’t know what to think.’
James’ ex-girlfriend, who naturally wished to remain unnamed, told us that this was the deciding factor in ending their 4 year relationship. ‘I could’ve let it slide, I really would’ve but… but then he started eating it from atop the cardboard packaging instead of a plate.
At that point I knew I couldn’t have his children’.
Possibly Related Purchase: The Pizza Bible: Everything You Need to Know